There are always down times and stressful situations in our lives. We could also have problems that can not be easily solved, and can not be shared with others.
It is challenging when our partner is having these kinds of tough times, since he/she may not be intimate with you, he/she may withdraw from you, he/she may not communicate or be responsive as he/she used to be.
In such situations it is your part to be supportive and do whatever possible in order to soothe your partner and help him/her get out of this. Here are some tips to help you support your partner.
Don’t put the pointer to yourself
When your partner is behaving weird or if he/she is not intimate with you, it is natural to think that you are the cause for that. Most of the people do this and take it personal.
They start to wonder if they have done something wrong or something that could have changed their partner’s behavior.
They spend their time and energy in this thought and forget to focus on ways to support their partner. Most of the times it is easier if you open up a conversation and simply ask the reason to your partner.
This is a straight and a simple way. If the problem is caused by you, then you can try to fix it, if the source of the problem is something/someone else, then you can think of ways to support your partner.
As I have just pointed out, communication is the key. You could support your partner just by a soothing conversation leading to lots of relaxation and calmness.
Your conversation could help your partner analyze the problem/situation and you could suggest possible ways to overcome a challenging situation. In short, you could support him/her and help him/her fix the issue completely, just through effective communication.
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Ask how you could help
You may think of a way to comfort your partner and be supportive. But he/she might be needing something else. Therefore it is wise to just ask your partner what kind of support he/she needs.
When you ask, don’t sympathize and make him/her feel pity or treat him/her as a victim. Don’t make him feel overwhelmed. When he/she asks for a support which is completely different of what you have thought of, then respect it and give your best.
Make space and be patient
You know that your partner is going through something difficult. Therefore give him/her the necessary space, this does not mean that you are abandoning him/her, but you are actually helping him/her out.
You can offer him all possible support, a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, compassionate words and so on but stay back and give him/her sometime to think on the problem and fix it. Let him/her make his/her own choice.
Don’t try to fix it yourself
You could be an expert, but don’t ever try to fix it for your partner yourself. Take all possible measures to help your partner solve his/her problem, but it is highly recommended that you stay away from jumping into the ground and try to fix it.
This is because you could be making the situation worse since it is not your problem. You may not exactly know the pros and cons of taking a measure and any of your steps to solve it may actually worsen the effects which your partner has to face.
Supporting your partner at times of stress will help to increase the bond and your relationship will grow stronger. Do whatever you can to help your partner, after all it is the best thing you can do in a healthy relationship.